Don’t Stick Your Dick In Crazy: Part 1

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Chapter 2

Devin parks his car in the lot behind the apartment building in which he lives and enters the place through the rear. Going to his door, Devin is surprised to find it standing open. He hesitates a moment before entering, wondering how he had happened to forget to lock the place the night before, then finally goes in and is further surprised to see a brunette sitting on the sofa having a drink. Devin blinks and stares at her. He doesn’t know her, has never seen the woman.

The brunette doesn’t get to her feet but just smiles at him.

“Hello,” she said. “I helped myself to a drink.”

Devin closes the door carefully. “So I see. Who are you, may I ask?”

She takes a sip of her scotch, studies Devin over the rim of the glass. “I moved into the apartment across the hall a couple of weeks ago.”

“I see. So you found my door unlocked and decided you’d come in and have a drink.”

The woman put the glass down and rises to her feet, smoothing her skirt down as she did so. She had lovely, long, well-tapered legs. Her skirt is short and reveals much of her thighs.

“I needed a drink and had run out of booze; I figured you’d have some, so I let myself in.”

“You broke in?” Devin asks wide-eyed.

“I guess…”

Devin removes his jacket and throws it down. “It’s Sunday morning,” he said. “I’ll join you in that drink.”

She smiles. “Thanks. The moment I saw you I figured you’d be cool.”

Devin fixed himself a scotch, stood holding the glass and looking at her. “Sit, make yourself at home,” he said sarcastically. “You look uncomfortable standing there like that.”

She sits, and her skirt creeps high on her legs. “Are you angry at me?”

“What’s your name?” Devin asks. “Mine is Devin Grant.”

She smiles again. “I’m Courtney.”

He studies her. “Do you have a surname?”

“Love,” she said with a glint of mischief in her eye.

“Very funny,” Devin said rolling his eyes.

“Courtney Anderson.”

“You’re beautiful,” Devin said. “Mind if I sit beside you?”

She moves over on the sofa. “Please do, Devin, it’s your couch.”

He again looks her over, noting the way Courtney’s dark hair hangs around her shoulders. Apparently, this woman doesn’t believe in hairdos, hers is neat and brushed but not set. Her skirt is unbelievably high on her legs, Devin has the impression she wants it that way, and he can see her flesh above the stockings. The man tries to figure out what she’s really doing here, breaking into his apartment and waiting. He catches the scent of her perfume then and decides he likes it.

“What are you thinking about?” Courtney asks.

Devin takes a swallow of his drink. “About you…”

She laughs. “You’re not gonna call the cops on me, are you?”

“No.”

“Good, but if I’m bothering you I’ll leave,” Courtney said lightly.

Devin takes another swallow. “I like being bothered by a pretty brown-eyed gal. I …err … am wondering about something though.”

“What?”

“Don’t you know if you walk into a bachelor’s apartment without knowing him you’re liable to get raped?” Devin asks.

Her eyelids flutter, and she puts down her scotch. “Oh …well … that really wouldn’t be so bad, would it? Especially if the bachelor is a good-looking guy like you.”

This sounds like an invitation. Devin grins. “I’m glad you agree with me. I think it sounds OK, too.”

She turns on the sofa and gazes deep into Devin’s eyes. “You wouldn’t rape me, would you? I mean, really.”

Devin can see all the way up her legs now. He grins slightly. “I might if you don’t put your legs together and do it right away.”

Courtney blushes slightly but doesn’t put her legs together. “Do you think I’d better leave now?”

There’s a mysterious look in her eyes. Devin finishes his drink, sets the glass down. “Stay here as long as you like,” he said. “Me, I’m taking a bath and getting shaved. Can’t stand these whiskers any longer.”

“You look good with whiskers,” Courtney said.

“Thanks. They’re coming off just the same.”

He starts to leave the room but stops and turns around catching her with her hand inside her blouse. Courtney doesn’t see him watching as she moves her breasts about. He feels the stirring again.

“Better watch that,” Devin said, grinning. “You’ll get raped…”

Courtney glances up, her lips parting. “Oh, I thought you’d left the room.”

The brunette removes her hand, and he notes how her breasts project. Devin would’ve liked to see them minus the confining of her blouse. Courtney closes her mouth, presses her lips tightly together and then relaxed and smiles.

“I really did,” she said with a nod. “I’m not trying to set you up.” She pauses. “Not in particular, that is.”

Courtney has a look of something akin to lust in her brown eyes.

Devin waves his hand. “As I said, I’m taking a bath. See you in a few minutes.”

“Would you … like me to help?”

Devin’s jaw drops. “What did you say?”

Courtney repeats her question, never once removing her gaze from his.

“I’d say you’re a fairly aggressive woman,” Devin said shaking his head. “If you wanna give me a bath … C’mon, I’m game.”

It appears he has met two sluts in one twenty-four hour period. What could be better?

“I was just kidding,” Courtney said with a grimace. “I guess it’s out of place. Sorry. Mind if I have another drink?”

“Help yourself, babe,” Devin said with a shrug and goes to the bathroom and strips off his clothing.

The man turns on the water in the shower and steps under it, lathering himself well with soap. It isn’t more than two minutes later that he sees Courtney enter the bathroom and stare at his nude body. Devin has mixed feelings about this. He wants her to do this and yet wonders if perhaps the pretty neighbor might not be a bit of a psychopath.

“You mind if I watch?” Courtney asks her lips parted.

Definitely now, there’s lust in her eyes. Anyone could’ve seen it. The water is running into Devin’s eyes, so he moves his head a little to escape it.

“You’re something,” he said. “You’re really something. Are you always this way?”

Courtney laughs. “Not always. Only when I see a guy, I like.”

“What makes you like me?”

He rubs more soap on his muscular body, and she watches his every move.

“That’s a good question. I can’t answer it. I like your looks. You have a very … strong body, haven’t you?”

Devin bent his head back and let the water run over his face briefly and then moves out from under it partially. “I was born with good genes, its just luck really,” he said.

Courtney takes a towel off the rack and holds it. “If you’re through, get out, and I’ll dry you if you don’t mind.”

The man gives his head a shake. This woman is unbelievable. She must be nuts, he thought. Devin turns the water off after a moment and gets out. Courtney begins to dry him with the towel, and he knows it’s going to happen. When he turns around, Courtney sees him and sucks in her breath in a gasp of pleasure.

“You’re really hung…’ Courtney said, her lips parting again.

She’s panting a little, and this makes his erection even more pronounced.

“What did you expect to happen? You can’t do this sort of a thing to a guy and not…”

“Please,” Courtney said. “Don’t be embarrassed. It excites me.”

“Who’s embarrassed? I’m not. Just puzzled. Never knew a woman to be so … Well, so … Shit, I don’t know what I’m trying to say…”

Courtney comes around in front of him and runs the towel up and down suggestively on his stomach. Devin doesn’t know if he should grin or grab her. The man wants to do the latter, but something stops him. Her dark hair is close to his chest, and he could’ve kissed the top of her head easily. Her blouse becomes a little wet from touching his body, but Courtney seems to pay no attention to this. When the brunette runs the towel slowly and gently over his hard-on, it’s more than Devin can stand. He throws his arms around her and kisses her mouth hungrily. Much to his astonishment, Courtney suddenly jumps away and strikes out at Devin with the wet towel.

“Hey…” Devin said, flinching a little. “What’s with you?”

Her eyes flash with anger; Courtney throws the towel down and flounces out of the bathroom.

“Hey…” Devin shouts. “I didn’t mean to offend you. Come back.”

Courtney doesn’t return, and he hears his apartment door slamming hard. The man stands in bewilderment. What a strange woman, Devin thought. After a moment, he gets another towel and finishes the job of drying himself. Devin shaves and changes into clean clothing and goes to the door. He peers into the hall. The entry of apartment five stands ajar, so Devin crosses the hall and knocks.

A tall, middle-aged man wearing glasses comes to the door. He peers at Devin owlishly. “Yes,” he snaps. “What is it?”

“I live across the hall. I saw a woman enter here a few minutes ago, and I thought I knew her. Does Courtney Anderson live here?”

“She’s my wife, young man,” the middle-aged man said shaking his head. “You can’t really know her. We just moved into the city yesterday from the East Coast. But how do you know her name?”

“Sorry,” Devin mumbles. “I must’ve made a mistake, my apologies, Mr. Anderson.”

The tall, thin man appeared disturbed. “I know what happened. She came to see you and probably put some moves on you. I’m sorry, but my wife isn’t well, she has bipolar disorder. I hope you’re not offended by her rudeness.”

“I see…” Devin said. “Matter of fact, she broke into my place and helped herself to my booze. Courtney told me her name, but nothing else happened.”

Devin thought it prudent to not to mention the other stuff.

“I’m so sorry; I’ll talk to her about it. Can you forget it this time?”

Devin nods. “Sure, just tell her breaking into my place isn’t cool and if it happens again, I’ll have to call the cops.”

Mr. Anderson nods. “I understand, but if I may, that old lock on your door is easy for any decent lock picker, maybe you should get a deadbolt lock installed.”

“Maybe my neighbors shouldn’t be picking my lock, to begin with,” Devin yells with a deep frown.

Devin turns and goes back into his apartment and closes the door, not waiting for the middle-aged man to respond. Just my luck, Devin thought, the new neighbor is fucking crazy. How am I supposed to deal with this every time I run into her in the corridor? Especially after the shower incident…

*****

When he arrives home from work the following evening, after stopping along the way for a couple of beers, Devin sees Courtney coming out the door of her apartment. He inserts the key in his lock and pretends he hadn’t seen the woman.

“Hey…” Courtney said when he enters his apartment, “What’s the matter, you mad at me or something?”

Devin turns and stares at the woman wide-eyed. “Hi,” he said. “No, I’m not mad. I … err … I had a talk with your husband about you.”

She takes the remark in stride and smiles nicely. “So? Did he give you the old ‘my wife is crazy’ line?”

Her eyes appear so innocent that Devin grins.

“Have fun,” Devin said and starts to close the door.

“Wait a minute. I want to talk to you, Devin.”

The man doesn’t want to talk to her—he has other plans. These included showering, cleaning up, and going to Amy’s place without calling her first. He wants to surprise her. However, the look on Courtney’s face does something to him, and Devin finds he doesn’t want to be unkind to Courtney.

“OK,” he said. “You want to come in or would your husband object?”

“He doesn’t mind. Besides, he’s not at home right now.”

Devin pushes the door all the way open and moves out of her way as Courtney enters and closes the door behind. The man wishes she hadn’t done that, but what can he say?

“OK,” Devin said. “What do you wanna talk about?”

He hopes she’ll get it over with quickly.

Courtney purses her pretty lips as though deep in thought. “I’m not really crazy. I know my husband told you I have bipolar. However, that’s not true. I’m what they call psycho-sexual; it’s not a mental illness but more a personality disorder.”

“I’m no doctor, I don’t understand all that stuff,” Devin said wishing the door were open even more.

“A mental illness can be controlled with drugs, right, like a cold, cos it’s a disease,” Courtney said. Devin nods. “A personality disorder is how you grew up, it’s hard-wired into your brain from childhood, and no drugs can fix it. It doesn’t mean I’m psychotic or anything, it’s just how I am. Do you understand? It just means I’m different…”

“You’re different, alright…” Devin said with a grimace.

Courtney shrugs and moves across the room, her hips swaying suggestively. “OK, I’m odd.” She brushes her long, dark hair away from her face. “I like you,” Courtney goes on. “You really turn me on, anything wrong with that?”

Devin shakes his head. “Not as long as we remember you have a husband.”

Courtney laughs coldly. “How can I ever forget? My parents forced me to marry him because they thought he’d be able to control me.”

Devin figured she’s lying. “They forced you? That’s illegal, isn’t it? Just leave him, you have your rights.”

“I can’t. No other means of subsistence.”

“Get a job,” Devin said.

“No thanks, I’m too lazy.”

He grins. “At least you’re honest about that.”

A strange glint comes into her brown eyes, but it disappears almost immediately. “Thanks,” Courtney said dryly.

“Don’t mention it,” Devin said, with equal dryness.

Courtney stands on one leg mostly, the other one stuck out at an angle in the manner of a fashion model. Somehow, it doesn’t look appealing to him.

“Hey…” Courtney said suddenly. “You … feel like having some fun?”

Devin rubs his chin. “I suppose you mean psycho-sexual fun?”

Courtney laughs. “What else?”

“Sorry, sounds like a blast, but I have a date,” he said hoping Courtney will get the hint.

Her eyes become clouded. “Stay here, Devin. I’ll do more for you than any other woman ever will.”

There’s nothing to do but open the door, which he does. “Go home…” Devin said softly. “Your husband is calling.”

There’s a sudden hostile look on her face, and then it’s gone. This woman can change from one mood to another very quickly, Devin thought. Courtney shrugs and moves past him through the doorway.

“OK, Devin, you don’t know what you’re missing. Let me tell you something, I’ll get to you yet, and you’ll love it.”

Devin said nothing; he closes the door after she leaves with a sigh. Then goes to pour a stiff drink he badly needs. The door opens again suddenly, Courtney stands there, her blouse and bra off and in her hand.

“Look at me…” Courtney shouts. “You ever see a pair of tits like these?”

Before Devin can move or say anything, Courtney disappears from view. The man stands motionless for a moment and then closes the door. Shaking his head and not knowing whether to laugh or cry, Devin pours a scotch and tosses it down. He then has another.

“What a nutter,” Devin mutters. “I thought Amy’s a bit dick crazy, but she’s an angel compared to this bitch.”

Amy isn’t a psycho, therefore, she’s not sexually aggressive like Courtney, Devin thought. Amy might seem slutty to some people, promiscuous is the word, but she’s not fucking crazy. I better get going before Courtney comes back.

*****

Some thirty minutes later, Devin’s in his car driving toward Third Avenue, the street on which Amy’s apartment house is located. He parks in front of the curb and enters the building, going up to the second floor. The man knocks on her door, and Amy opens it immediately.

“Oh, hi,” Amy said smiling. “I had an idea you might drop over tonight.” She spins around on a heel. “So I’m all dressed and ready for you, Devin.”

“Hi, Amy,” Devin said grinning.

Undressed seems to be a more appropriate word for it. Amy wears only a tiny miniskirt and a bra that’s next to nothing. The sexy blonde closes the door, takes his hand, and standing on her toes, kisses his mouth quickly.

“I’m so glad you came,” she said.

“I’m so glad we met last Saturday night,” Devin said warmly

“So am I. We had fun yesterday morning. At least, I did.”

Up to now, Devin hadn’t seen the other woman present. His mouth hangs open as Devin glances at her swiftly. The strange woman is about the same age as Amy, early twenties, and has red hair and a build as good as the beautiful blonde. The redhead has a look of lust in her eyes, too, as did Amy. What have I stumbled into, Devin wonders?

Amy sees him staring at the redhead. “Oh … Devin … this is Katie Shrivell, a friend of mine.”

“Hello, Katie,” Devin said with a smile.

Katie smiles at him from across the room where she apparently had been staring out the window. “Hi,” Katie said. “Amy has been telling me all about you.”

“Such as what?” he asks with a grin.

Katie grins back. “I’d better not say. Amy would get mad at me.”

“Katie…” Amy said, “I’m sorry, I can’t go to the club with you tonight for obvious reasons.”

The redhead crosses the room, stops by the door and stares at Devin, up and down, in an appraising manner.

“I don’t blame you, Amy. If I had a chunk of beef like him, I wouldn’t go to the club, either.” She winks at Devin. “Goodbye, Devin, see you around.”

Devin grins again. “Sure…” he said, “The sooner, the better.”

“Hey, you two, stop hitting on each another in front of me,” Amy shouts.

“Sorry,” Katie said. “Can’t help it, Amy. You know me.”

The redhead winks at Devin again and leaves. He lights a cigarette without thinking to offer Amy a smoke. Devin seems delightfully confused for the moment. All these sexy girls he has run into in the last day or so, it’s enough to make any man delightfully confused.

“Hey, Devin,” Amy said getting his attention. “You’re looking good today.”

“Thanks, you look pretty hot yourself.”

Amy sighs. “Why don’t you kiss me?”

He takes her in his arms and kisses Amy wetly on the mouth, releasing her, after a long moment. The blonde brushes her hair back.

“Whew, who taught you to kiss that way?”

“My mom,” he said flippantly.

“Some mom…” Amy said rolling her eyes, “How about a drink?”

“Make it a double; I’ve had a weird day.”

“I’ll make it a triple. I have dark, sinister plans for you.”

“Oh… Such as what?”

Amy arches her brows as she pours him straight bourbon. “That’d be telling, Devin.”

He takes the glass out of her hand. “Tell me anyway.”

“I don’t think I’d better,” Amy said slowly. “You might leave.”

“Try me,” he said, taking a sip of the bourbon.

The blonde pours a drink for herself. “No, I’ll just let you find out a little at a time.”

“C’mon…” Devin said, grinning at her. “Tell me … You’ve got me curious as all fuck. What is it you have planned for me?”

Amy lifts her glass to her mouth and drinks all of the booze in one gulp. Her eyes water briefly as she turns to look at the man. “Can’t tell you, but I can show you.”

“All right, show me,” Devin said setting his glass down.

“We have to go to the bedroom…”

“Let’s go. Like I said, I’m curious as hell.”

Amy moves away from him, her hips swaying nicely and Devin follows her into the bedroom. The blonde shoves her panties down without removing the miniskirt. Lying across the bed, Amy lifts her skirt, placing her hand over her pussy.

“Now, do you know what I have planned, Devin?” Amy asks her voice husky.

He moistens his lips. “Yes, I think I know what you have in mind.”

Her eyes take on a look of wild lust as she removes her hand, exposing her pussy to his gaze.

“Will you get on your knees, Devin? Please? I must have you kiss me there.”

 

Continued on the next page (link below).

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